Feeling low on energy? Trying to gain more will result in an opposite outcome.
It is a regular weekday and today I have an appointment with a new client. We have agreed to meet up on my houseboat where I live (the view here is amazing).
So when I hear someone at the door I open up. A tall well-dressed man with grey hair is standing on the docks. In one hand a notebook and the other the keys of his BMW.
We both take a seat at the wooden table that treats us with a spectacular view over the water. And I asked the question why are you here?
And in a way I knew the answer already because most men present me with two challenges (and of course all kinds of variations on this):
I’m stuck in my current life and I don’t know how to get out of it.
My personal performance is too low because of low levels of energy.
In this case, the answer is: “I don’t have the energy to enjoy my life”. On the outside, I have it all with a good running company, a beautiful partner a fantastic kid, and all the money I need.
Every day I wake up tired and from around noon I drag myself through my days. I want more energy. Could you help me with that?
I stand up from the wooden table and I walk to the kitchen. I open up the drawers take out a pack of AA batteries walk back to the table and place them in front of them.
Here is more energy your problem is solved.
I see a smile on his face and we both start to laugh. That was exactly what I was looking for because most men are taking themselves way too seriously. And by shifting our state we can have a different conversation.
Then I asked the question: When was the last time that you did absolutely nothing for let's say 15 minutes? So no sports, reading, on your phone, etc absolutely nothing.
I don’t remember. Think hard I say.
Mwah, when I was six. Okay, how old are you now?
46 is my current age
So your challenge is that you have low levels of energy and it’s 44 years ago that you did absolutely nothing for 15 minutes.
MMM, this problem isn’t so hard to tackle I say.
We both started to laugh again and within six months his energy has improved significantly.
Trying to gain more energy will actually give you the opposite outcome. I see it happen every time. You buy all the supplements, bio-hacking gadgets and go through all the courses.
Sometimes it helps, but it never gives you the sustainable results you are looking for.
Or maybe you start to work out (or workout more) because you believe that improving your physical health only will solve your problem. But aren’t you overtaxed already?
And a workout is physical stress on the stress that is already too high in the first place.
All those things are about doing and it will run you in the ground for sure.
The thinking flaw here is that we think we need more energy. That energy is the end goal but it’s a result of something else.
How we show up, what we currently believe, how we see ourselves, how we manage our energy, and much much more.
Is it easy to comprehend, yes? Is it hard to change?
That all depends on your willingness to take back responsibility for you